The signing went very well last night, despite the frosty conditions here.
Today’s flight… not as great. Canceled, actually. Apparently I’ll be on a later flight back to LA. Apparently. Allegedly. Possibly.
Meanwhile, I read that Secretary Gates is considering sending more troops into Afghanistan. This is actually a swell idea - it’ll put our boys that much closer to Osama bin Laden and Mullah Omar. Right next door, in fact.
One big question is where those additional troops are going to come from. I stopped by Fort Hood yesterday to borrow a platoon (my mother-in-law needed some yard work done. This sort of thing happens in Texas all the time), and they told me they were “fresh out.” So I just borrowed a shovel, which they said they’d “definitely need back by Thursday.”
That’s when it hit me - where are those additional troops for Iraq going to come from? Afghanistan! And where are the additional troops for Afghanistan coming from? You guessed it - Iraq.
It all makes so much sense when you think about it. We’ve been training guys in both countries, training the heck out orf ‘em, in fact. They’re having some troubles in their hometowns, yes, no question about it. But as foreign peace keepers, they might just be able to get it done. The phrase “greeted as liberators” comes to mind.
I think the thing that terrifies me the most today is that I’m not completely convinced that this is actually that stupid an idea.
Meanwhile, I’ve gotta go. I’m heading to the airport, and I have to return this shovel on the way…





42 comments
waterfowler
January 17, 2007 at 10:49 am
1I feel safe now that Asshat is in charge of our military.
dee
January 17, 2007 at 11:44 am
2Hmm…must be a common surname. There have been Asshats in charge of our miltary for years.
David
January 17, 2007 at 12:30 pm
3Even a good idea in the hands of functional idiots can fail. We have one road in Afghanistan we are actually interested in, the Trans-Afghanistan Petro-Interests Thruway (the A-1 on Cheney’s global petroleum reserves chart for Afghanistan). Maybe our troops can accomplish something positive in spite of Cheney and Company. Lobster knows they are more than willing to try. And I’m willing to hope, even if hope is not a policy.
Barack
January 17, 2007 at 4:16 pm
4Hope is not a policy? Damn! Do the voters know this?
Boomer
January 17, 2007 at 4:33 pm
5It appears that Alberto Gonzales has a career salvaging (he hopes!) 11th hour conversion, swearing allegiance to The Bill of Rights and to respect for civil liberties. It probably has nothing to do with the subpeonas and investigations coming hot off the Congressional grill. Doesn’t the air just smell sweeter these days?
http://www.cnn.com/2007/POLITICS/01/17/domestic.spying/index.html
hedera
January 17, 2007 at 9:26 pm
6What boggles the mind is the straight faces with which they all lie like flatfish, and make up new, prettier lies the minute the old ones become unsupportable. And begin respecting civil rights the minute we kick their toad-eating flunkies out of Congress…
tess
January 18, 2007 at 2:16 am
7Hell, I’m still pised that they cut science funding or else we could’ve designed a teleporter or cloning machine so that our soldiers can be at two places at the same time. 2x the tours, 2x the PTSD!
Murray
January 18, 2007 at 6:08 am
8Take troops from Afghanistan and send them to Iraq, and take troops from Iraq and send them to Afghanistan. That’s a great ideal! And the administration can pay for it with their Visa Card which they can pay off with their Master Card, which they can pay off with their Visa Card, which….
David
January 18, 2007 at 6:38 am
9American Express, Murray. American Express.
There’re always snowflake babies, tess, if we could just figure out a way to get them through gestation and up to 19 in 30 days. I mean better to produce foot soldiers for the Decider than have unused fertilized eggs go for something as immoral as basic medical research. The former squares with “Onward, Christian Soldiers.” The latter smacks of Nazi medical research. Seems pretty clear to me.
Harold
January 18, 2007 at 8:55 am
10I was reading Adam’s suggestion as being that we train Ahghani troops to fight in Iraq, and Iraqi troops to fight in Afghanistan. Sort of a cross-cultural encounter. The experience will be good for troops on both sides. And if it devolves into a full fledged war btween Iraq and Afghanistan - well, hey, at least they’re not fighting us!
Alberto Gonzalez had an 11th hour conversion? Is this the same Alberto Gonzalez who just yesterday informed federal judges that their role is to simply support decisions made by the President and not to interpret the law on their own? What do they think thy are, part of a third branch of the government?
siobhan
January 18, 2007 at 9:20 am
11Harold, that implies that the adminstration thinks there’s a second branch of government.
It's Pat!
January 18, 2007 at 10:37 am
12It’s still a secret tribunal. It sounds better than it smells.
Ann
January 18, 2007 at 12:55 pm
13Harold, I think you understood Adam correctly. When the Iraqi army is fighting in ‘Stan, they won’t be dealing with their friends and family. And then we can strategically withdraw, leaving the two countries at war. At least it won’t be a civil war.
Dale
January 18, 2007 at 3:29 pm
14I can see it now, Bush was at some Progeny-of-Republican-Donor birthday party, things were dragging, kids were crying, and then someone had the bright idea to start a game of musical chairs. And so a military strategy was born. (”C’mon boys! I’m going to start “God Bless America” and when the music stops, everybody better be deployed in a different Islamic country!”)
cooper
January 18, 2007 at 5:52 pm
15Ann, war is never civil.
cooper
January 18, 2007 at 6:32 pm
16hedera, David, Boomer, siobhan - remember George McGovern? Of course you do. Well, he’s still a fun read. This column from The Nation is a right and proper skewering the Jr Bush.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/thenation/20070117/cm_thenation/20070129mcgove rn
My favorite slogan from McGovern’s Presidential campaign - “Don’t change Dicks in the middle of a screw; Vote for Nixon in ‘72″. Wow, we baby boomers really had a way with words, didn’t we?
SeattleTammy
January 18, 2007 at 7:02 pm
17Apparently, Fannie does not like people sharing computer tips, but here’s try #2.
Occasionally, Tony quits rolling his eyeballs all the way back and actually shows me something on the internet tubes.
If you go to tiny url you can download their site as a button on your tool bar or fav bar and then when you want to quote something with a reee-aa-llll-y long address: Have the site up, click the button, and you now have a small (10 to 15) character address to use in your post.
Then your addresses won’t go running all outside the box.
Pretty cool huh?
Ann
January 18, 2007 at 7:19 pm
18Cooper, is that the excuse Dubya’s using to deny the obvious?
Dale
January 18, 2007 at 7:38 pm
19Well if Afghanistan can get some good left-hand rear gunners and get rid a few of those all-field, no-hit artillery specialists, I think it might be a win-win trade.
SeattleDan
January 18, 2007 at 7:40 pm
20Groovy post, coop. I’ll be tripping on it all night. I hope it doesn’t become a bummer, though.
Dale
January 18, 2007 at 8:44 pm
21“with their Visa Card which they can pay off with their Master Card, which they can pay off with their Visa Card, which…. American Express, Murray. American Express…”
Fanny, what the hell? And yet you pounce upon my suggestion (zingingly witty, it’ll show up any day now) of a t-r-a-d-e between the Afghani and Iraqi teams?
Harold
January 18, 2007 at 9:06 pm
22I wonder if Fanny still hates the phrase “wingtip shoes”?
Harold
January 18, 2007 at 9:11 pm
23Maybe so! I think I just got blacklisted! What the hell?
David
January 19, 2007 at 8:18 am
24George McGovern continues to demostrate why he was a far, far superior choice in ‘72. Pity American voters have such a penchant for voting the myopic cliches, expressing anger at the polls only when they can no longer deny their choices are fubars. ‘Course I’ve got to factor in the reality that W couldn’t win an honest presidential election, but then why in hell was it close enough for electoral theft to be a possibility?
Other bumper sticker: Dick Nixon Before He Dicks You. Problem was that we didn’t Dick him until after he had well and truly Dicked us. And now W has gotten away with out-Nixoning Nixon by an amazing margin, and Lobster only knows how much worse it will get before the bastard is retired to his photo op ranch.
Dale,
I suspect Fanny is using us as her lab rats, perhaps in a brain-damaged attempt to emulate the mice in Hitchhiker’s Guide.
cooper
January 19, 2007 at 10:05 am
25Ann, apparently W doesn’t need an excuse to deny the obvious.
Harold, try “wingnut” shoes next time. We’ll know what you mean, though why one would gush about wingt*p shoes in the first place is a puzzle.
Dale
January 19, 2007 at 5:40 pm
26The fanaticist’s wardrobe: wingnut shoes and an ass hat.
Katie
January 20, 2007 at 6:12 pm
27Not to sound cynical….. oh, wait, I AM cynical…. BUT one great little loophole in the rules that are *supposed* to be protecting our troops from redeploying too soon?
Say I’m a reservist (which I am, btw) and they ship my butt to Iraq for a year (total deployment 18-20 months with trainup and stand down); I am not eligible to be deployed against my will to Iraq for 2 years. However, Afganistan is a completely *different* theater, and a completely *different* war. They can turn around and ship my butt to a different war immediately. Not nice, not ethical, but completely legal under the current guidelines.
They can also request *volunteers* to return before their time limit is up.
Dirty Rat Bastards. (no offense meant, Fanny)
Dale
January 20, 2007 at 8:19 pm
28Katie, according to the Administratin’s own logic, aren’t they the same theater of operations? I mean, it’s all just one big “war on terror,” no? And what do national borders matter in this “new” war against a “new” enemy that “knows no borders”?
It’s worth a shot, anyway.
Katie
January 21, 2007 at 6:45 am
29Dale -
Afganistan and Iraq are 2 separate and distinct wars for the military community. They have their own names, their own service awards, etc. Operation Enduring Freedom and Operation Iraqi Freedom. When you are mobilized, you are mobilized in support of one or the other. They are both considered “wars on terrorism” but the public assumption that they are the same war goes along with the whole smoke-and-mirrors campaign to get the American public to believe that Iraq was responsible for 9/11 and that the Taliban were also responsible for 9/11. Then, as Murray stated the gov’t can rob Peter to pay Paul with troop movements…. Take a battalion from one and send it to the other. It restarts their 2 yr max deployment clock, while their clock tobe sent back to the first place keeps on ticking.
You can kind of think about it like WWII, where we had the war in Europe and the war in the Pacific.
David
January 21, 2007 at 7:10 am
30I guess it goes along with the whole If you think about the soldiers’ lives, really think about the soldiers’ lives, beyond the immediate context of troops trying to keep their buddies alive in a deadly confrontation, you can’t be a military commander. You’re a tank, you’re a humvee, you’re an M-16 (in the case of the soldiers I’ve known, you’re also a damned decent human being, but that is a whole separate issue from commanders and assets). I have no trouble remembering why I wasn’t about to be a troop in Viet Nam under Johnson or Nixon, or their SecDefs, especially in the context of utterly misguided, disinformed anti-communism, and in the middle of a civil war killing women, old men, and children, including the ones who might have been guerillas trying to defend their homes from invaders.
Luckily, of course, our troops are not trapped in an even remotely comparable dilemma in Iraq.
Dale
January 21, 2007 at 3:20 pm
31Katie–I totally agree that they are two separate wars and theaters…but on paper, the military answers to the civilian chain of command, and if the civilian command wants to use smoke and mirrors (or more accurately out-and-out lies) to get authorization and funding for the war, then I think they should have to stick with those lies when it comes to troop deployment rationale. If it looks like two wars, and quacks like two wars, then it is two wars….but the President says it’s one war (and used that argument to get us into the second war in the first place) and as he’s constantly reminding us, he’s “in charge”–so I think you can make a case that damnit, it is one war, and you ain’t going nowheres for 2 years. (I don’t think a WWII vet back from Europe and with promise of 1 year off could then be deployed to Okinawa the next month.)
hedera
January 21, 2007 at 9:19 pm
32Dale, I think you’re mistaken to assume that a WWII doughboy redeployed from Europe wouldn’t have been shipped right back out to Okinawa - I think he would have been. I’ve read a lot about WWII, and I don’t ever remember anyone mentioning a year off between duty rotations. Guys served consecutive years in that war without seeing the home front. You got to go home if you were wounded enough to incapacitate you, and if you recovered before it was over, you went back. Go back and read Catch-22; that was what drove Yossarian crazy.
Also, Katie’s talking about reserve deployments, and in WWII we were not talking reserves, it was the draftee army. Everybody who was physically capable was deployed to the front, except for occasional quite short R&R breaks, which were only in the U.S. if you happened to be near Hawaii.
The mess we have now is organizationally and logistically almost entirely different from WWII, and not just because the weapons are more advanced.
Dale
January 21, 2007 at 10:00 pm
33I fully acknowledge that there is no historical leg to stand on here, but I was just trying to provide some sophistic evasion/stall tactics at the level of our own government’s tortured rhetoric. And since, as you said, in WWII there was an actual draft and they were not fighting with reserve units to whom they have made promises of non-redeployment for 2 years, hence I think Katie can argue that the WWII precedent doesn’t hold.
(Catch-22 is my 2nd favorite book all time! But I can’t go back and read it now because I try not to read it more than once every 5 years, so there is some process of re-discovery each time.)
SeattleDan
January 21, 2007 at 10:14 pm
34There’s nothing wrong in re-reading a favorite book as often as you want. Librarian Savant Nancy Pearl here in Seattle admits to reading John LeCarre’s “Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy” every year. And why not, it’s a great book. Read what you want when you want. Unless you’re in graduate school and what you read isn’t under your control.
SeattleDan
January 21, 2007 at 10:26 pm
35And, Dale, I’m guessing your favorite #1 book has something to do with that good Knight of La Mancha?
Katie
January 22, 2007 at 7:46 am
36Dale -
Bush doesn’t know his *ss from second base. Yes, in his speeches lumps everything together as a war on terror, and it is all meant to avenge 9/11. Yaddah yaddah yaddah.
What *I* am talking about is the actual military policies.
Operation Enduring Freedom (Afganistan) and Operation Iraqi Freedom are 2 separate, distinct entities in terms of DOD policies. If you are mobilized for one theater, it has absolutely no effect on your potential to be mobilized for the other theater. A soldier/sailor/arman/marine who is coming off of 24 months of activation in Iraq cannot be forced back to Iraq for 2 years. They can be forced to Afganistan the next day, because that is a *different* war. They have not been sent there, so there is no impediment to their deployment, they have a totally new clock to start. Also, the DOD can ‘request’ units waive their full 2 years of home rotation to go back early. And some troops that are mission critical can also be sent back early due to operational needs.
This is why we have troops in total burnout.
I laugh at the blind assumption that we are going to be able to increase troops by 10s of thousands, just because POTUS says so. We are offering unheard of incentives - bonuses up to 20K, extra pay, etc etc etc and we are loosing troops at a faster rate than ever, and we are having trouble meeting recruiting levels right now, much less increasing by thousands.
Kids aren’t lining up saying, “pick me, pick me! I want to go drive a HUMVEE and pray I don’t get killed by an IED or randlom Iraqi on the street.”
Also, right now, kids that would have never made it into the service 7-10 years ago are being let in by the thousands. Test scores are being dropped….. the military gives everyone considering the service a standardized battery of tests called the ASVAB…. basic math, reasoning, reading, direction following, mechanical aptitude, etc. etc. Nothing was above about a 9th grade learning level. To get into a specific branch of service, you had to score a minimum amount, Air Force was the highest cutoff, Army was the lowest at 39%. Your actual score determined which job or jobs you could pick from. Each job within the military has a minimum ASVAB score associated with it. (A very few specialized positions require prior learning before entering the military.)
The Army has now dropped its’ enterance minimum to 34%. Think about that for a minute. 34% on a standardized test at the 9th grade level, from kids who have graduated high school. these are the kids that can’t even get a job asking, “Would you like fries with that?”. (And before I get a barrage of hate mail, I am in no way disparaging people who, for one reason or another, have a very low apptitude. I am merely pointing out that these MAY NOT be the people you want in a war zone. We have had enough friendly-fire deaths.)
So, either the DOD institutes a total stop-loss over all branches of service (meaning that no one can retire or leave at the end of their contract. During stop-loss, you are forced to continue serving until the stop-loss is lifted.) and/or they will have to seriously look at reinstituting the draft. (And then there will be an outcry to end the war).
katie
Murray
January 22, 2007 at 4:15 pm
37Well this is what happens when you trap a rat that can’t back up. Bush desperately wants to not loose this lost war, and the only way to avoid admitting defeat is to up the troops and pray that this will make enough of a difference to wait out 2009 when it will be someone else’s mess.
Where do the troops come from? He can’t pull them out of Germany, South Korea, etc. so he has to try to add kids. Money is no object, it all goes on a credit card anyway, and it will be added to the mess that others have to clean up. So here’s a new Corvette kid, just sign on the dotted line.
hedera
January 22, 2007 at 8:53 pm
38I see that there is a WWII parallel going on here; Katie’s description of stop-loss sounds like something Bill Mauldin’s Willie and Joe would instantly recognize.
A propos the lowered recruiting standards, think about this for awhile: the ones who don’t get blown up by an IED will come back to the U.S., eventually, with detailed training in how to kill with advanced weapons and still a 34% aptitude level on a 9th grade test. I’ve read in at least one article that they’re already having problems with gang affiliations. The Latino street gangs already have heavy weapons; do we really want them to have heavy weapons and military training??
another Matt
January 22, 2007 at 8:54 pm
39Bush just has to leave the troops in long enough to blame the failure on the Democrats for refusing to support the war. It’s been his great misfortune that the Dems have shamelessly kow-towed to his every request thus far.
Might have to find a different scapegoat. Now the White House is setting up the Iraqis themselves as fall guys for failing to “step up”.
Dale
January 22, 2007 at 11:23 pm
40And, Dale, I’m guessing your favorite #1 book has something to do with that good Knight of La Mancha?
Huh? Was he in “Schrodinger’s Ball”?
David
January 23, 2007 at 6:46 pm
41You got it, another Matt. Let’s all just blame the people whose country, pretty much all infrastructure, and all civil institutions, reminiscent of what is done to a person’s hair before the permanent [bases].
David
January 23, 2007 at 6:49 pm
42…all civil institutions we and the Brits destroyed…