From Manorama online: “Attacks Turn Iraq Election into Stealth Campaign”

Basra - As Iraq’s election campaign enters its final stages, most candidates are more worried about staying alive than canvassing for votes. Even the few like Shi’ite politician Mansour al-Tamimi who have openly joined the electoral race are avoiding debates and rallies at all cost.

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Hamid Kalzami, United Kurd Alliance: “If elected, I promise to do… things. For… people. The Iraqi people deserve… stuff. Do not seek to find me or my campaign headquarters again.”

Soodonym al Ias, Liberty of God Party: “A vote for me is a vote for a nondescript man with indistinct features. I intend to bring peace to Iraq using every inch of my 4 to 7 foot high frame and reddish blondish brownish hair. May god bless certain Iraqi people.”

Nassir al -Chalidrichi, Benign Sunni Union Party: “My friends, the time for change has come. For more specific information, take the Al Mawsil road out of Baghdad after affixing a plain green banner to the roof of your car. Upon hearing three gunshots, stop your vehicle, blindfold yourself, and walk towards the smell of lilacs. Turn right at the river and walk until you feel a tap on your shoulder. Await further instructions.”

Yusef al Mansour Shahristani, Patriotic Sunni Union: “Election? I’ve heard nothing about it. And of course I’m not running. I don’t know who told you that. You must have me confused with another Yusef al Mansour Shahristani.”