- Spend more time with family. Devise system to identify them. [possible idea: Younger female = “green,” older female = “violet,” etc.]

- Merge kitchen and dining room into one “food production, consumption, and disposal” unit. Eliminate those unnecessary redundancies (tables, dinnerware, chairs, etc.).

- Earn money in the private sector. Haven’t actually done this before, really. [idea - do I currently work with anyone who might provide me with advice, letters of recommendation, or cushy 8-figure board positions? Ask around.]

- Take kids aside for lecture about the extreme dangers of drugs, sex, peer pressure, hitchhiking, etc. Offer no specific details or strategies, just admonish them to be on alert.

- Look into combining kitchen and dining room - having ‘em both is wasteful and redundant!

- Investigate starting up that Vampire protection business - “We have to keep the vampires out 100% of the time, they…” This could work!

- Build that entertainment center the kids have been asking for. Buy: Duct tape, plastic sheeting, magical entertainment center beans.

- Streamline the ol’ household to make it more efficient. Do we really need a kitchen and a dining room?