WASHINGTON (Reuters) - The Sept. 11 commission, which reported no evidence of collaborative links between Iraq and al Qaeda, said on Tuesday that Vice President Dick Cheney had no more information than commission investigators to support his later assertions to the contrary.

Cheney spokesman Kevin Kellems denied any conflict between the commission’s finding of no Saddam/al Qaeda relationship and the vice president’s position. He described Cheney as being “pleased” about the commission’s statement and said the message “put to rest a non-story.

“As we have said all along, the administration provided the commission with unprecedented access to sensitive information so they could perform their mission,” said Kellems, who noted that the commission’s report was a draft.

“We look forward to reading the commission’s final report,” he added.

…The commission called White House claims about links between Saddam Hussein and al Qaeda into question on June 11…

But Bush and his top aides stood firm, with Cheney forcefully maintaining that evidence depicting an Iraqi role in the Sept. 11 attacks may yet emerge.

“The notion that there is no relationship between Iraq and al Qaeda just simply is not true,” Cheney said in an interview with CNBC in which the vice president also suggested he might have more information than the panel.

The New York Times later reported Kean and Hamilton hoped to see any additional information Cheney had on the subject.

As part of the White House response to the Sept. 11 commission’s report, national security adviser Condoleezza Rice said she believed the panel was actually denying Saddam had control over al Qaeda. Kean and Hamilton flatly rejected her interpretation.

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Reading this story two or three times made my head feel kind of strange, the way it sometimes does when I try to drink a very thick milkshake through a swizzle stick. Or when I look at my T-shirt that says “The statement on this T-shirt is false.” Or when I stick a screwdriver too far into my ear. That kind of feeling. So I called the Vice President’s office for some clarification. Kevin Kellems was eager to help…

FELBER: Thanks for taking the time, Mr. Kellems.

KELLEMS: No problem. Call me Mr. Kellems.

FELBER: I… okay. Mr. Kellems, the 9/11 panel seems to be contradicting Vice President Cheney’s earlier statements about the relationship between al Qaeda and Iraq.

KELLEMS: No they’re not.

FELBER: Well, they seem to think that Iraq had no role in the 9/11 attacks…

KELLEMS: Oh, they do?

FELBER: Yes.

KELLEMS: Well, given what evidence they have to work with, that doesn’t surprise me at all. They wouldn’t know of the deeper relationship between Saddam and al Qaeda, would they?

FELBER: But they seem to think that they have all the evidence that the Vice President has.

KELLEMS: They do. Absolutely. They’ve been given unprecedented access.

FELBER: Yeah, but, Mr. Kellems-

KELLEMS: - please, “Mr. Kellems” is my father. Call me Kevin.

FELBER: But… All right, Kevin?

KELLEMS: …

FELBER: Kevin?

KELLEMS: …

FELBER: Mr. Kellems?

KELLEMS: Yes?

FELBER: Uh, you say that it’s true that the Commission saw everything Mr. Cheney saw.

KELLEMS: Yup. Unprecedented access. We look forward to the report.

FELBER: And the report indicates a contradiction between the relationship that Mr. Cheney alluded to and the actual relationship between…

KELLEMS: Oh, sure, I see where you’re going with this. The commission doesn’t see how Saddam Hussein definitely helped plot 9/11.

FELBER: He did?

KELLEMS: Let’s just say that there’s evidence that may yet emerge…

FELBER: Evidence!?

KELLEMS: You betcha.

FELBER: There was evidence that the 9/11 Commission wasn’t allowed to see?

KELLEMS: Whoa! Of course not. They’ve been given every single solitary shred of evidence. Access that’s totally unprecedented, I might add.

FELBER: Right, but when I asked if -

KELLEMS: Please, call me Mr. Kellems.

FELBER: But I didn’t call you anything just now.

KELLEMS: Right. And that’s rude.

FELBER: Okay, Mr. Kellems -

KELLEMS: - Kevin.

FELBER: Kevin -

KELLEMS: Your name is Kevin too? That’s weird.

FELBER: No, my name’s Adam.

KELLEMS: Heh heh… Well, I’m not surprised that you’d think that, given your level of access.

FELBER: Which is?

KELLEMS: Complete and total. Unprecedented. I look forward to your report.

FELBER: Can we get back to the relationship between Saddam and al Qaeda?

KELLEMS: See, even someone outside the loop like yourself has heard about it!

FELBER: Outside the… I… Mr. Kellems… it…

KELLEMS: Take it easy. You’re trying to tell me about the way Saddam plotted 9/11, aren’t you?

FELBER: I… suppose…

KELLEMS: I understand. There’s only so much you can tell me, right?

FELBER: Uh, yeah, but… no…

KELLEMS: Listen, I just want to thank you for taking the time to clear things up, Mr. Kellems.

FELBER: Um… please… call me Kevin…?

KELLEMS: Okay. Well, nice talking to you, Mr. Kellems.

FELBER: You too…

KELLEMS: Bye.

FELBER: Um… I…

[A *click*, followed by a dial tone.]

All in all, I think the call went pretty well. By the end of it, Felber seemed pretty bamboozled (the moron!) and I was able to get back to work.