From MSNBC: PORTLAND, Ore. - Offering a rare public apology, the FBI admitted mistakenly linking an American lawyer’s fingerprint to one found near the scene of a terrorist bombing in Spain, a blunder that led to his imprisonment for two weeks…
The FBI maintained its certainty even as Spanish authorities said by mid-April that the original image of the fingerprint taken directly from the bag did not match Mayfield’s…
According to court documents, FBI agents began their surveillance of Mayfield two weeks after the attacks in the Spanish capital. Under a provision of the U.S. Patriot Act, they entered his home without his knowledge…
During a later raid, FBI agents took Mayfield’s computers, modem, safe deposit key, assorted papers, as well as copies of the Quran and what they classified as “Spanish documents” — apparently Spanish homework by one of Mayfield’s sons…
Mayfield, who runs a small Portland law office, was never facing any formal charges.
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Dear Citizen;
Some of you might be a little concerned over the implications of the Brandon Mayfield story that you may have been hearing about. Allow us to take this opportunity to dispel any of your doubts and fears.
Yes, using provisions in the Patriot Act and the material witness rule, we broke into the house of an innocent man without his knowledge. Yes, we took his stuff in a raid. Yes, we then arrested him, imprisoned him, threw him in solitary confinement, sent him to the mental ward, and held him for two weeks without charges before we finally released him and apologized.
That’s all true. So sue us. Oh, wait a minute - you can’t! Ha-ha, just a little joke there. Relax. Geez, sometimes you civilians have no sense of humor…
Anyhoo, we want to point out two important details to any of you who might feel a little uneasy about this: 1) No matter what the whinypantses might say, this is still a free country, and 2) We apologized.
Okay, as to item #1 - Sure, there used to be a lot of weird and restrictive laws that stopped us from searching, seizing, and imprisonment without charge. And now those laws aren’t really laws anymore, more like guidelines. True enough. But the thing is - this is still America, land of the free, and even if your freedoms aren’t exactly on the books anymore, you still have ‘em. Because we’re all Americans here, and we wouldn’t go stomping on your rights just because you don’t actually have them. Trust us. That’s what American freedom’s all about nowadays - trust. Who needs laws when you have that?
Turning to #2 - we said we were sorry. A question to you longhaired Blame America First folks - how many other countries in the world would apologize when they’d made a mistake like that? We’re betting that you haven’t traveled much and don’t know the answer to that, so we’ll tell you: None. Not one. Foreigners have no respect for freedom.
One more point - it wouldn’t happen to you. Sure, maybe Mayfield turned out to be “innocent.” But look at what he was doing: He’d converted to Islam, his fingerprints almost kinda matched those found on a bag connected to the Madrid bombings, and his son just so happened to have been doing Spanish “homework” the week we broke in. Okay, maybe we were wrong about the fingerprints, as the Spanish government kept saying, maybe the “homework” really was homework, but you gotta admit, it was a pretty shady picture. Not the kind of thing you’d find yourself messed up in, am I right? So it’s those “almost connected to terrorism” people that have something to worry about, see?
And you’re not almost connected to terrorism, are you? Are you? Don’t answer, we’ll just let ourselves in and see for ourselves - KIDDING! See, that’s what we mean. You guys have to lighten up. Go shopping our something. Do what you want, and let’s all relax okay? We’re cool, and that’s why we can live completely free without too many stupid “laws” or “protections.” Totally chill, all of us. America: We’re free because we’re chill. Right?
Best,
The Federal Bureau of Investigations
Fanny Roborat
19 comments
Steve
May 25, 2004 at 3:20 pm
1You have to admit that at least the kid had the perfect excuse: “The FBI ate my homework!”
jr
May 25, 2004 at 4:48 pm
2Yes, but he was prohibited from using that excuse by the Patriot Act.
Poor kid, but I understand he’s getting a nice tattoo from than nice Manson fellow.
Don
May 25, 2004 at 5:09 pm
3I’m now afraid to drink margaritas or dance Salsa — in either order.
tess
May 25, 2004 at 7:48 pm
4“you still have your freedoms because we say you do! not that our word is legally binding, but take it from us that you’re still free! just protected!”
littlebit
May 25, 2004 at 9:17 pm
5We do it for your own good because we know better than you do. How do you spell Machiavelli? Absolute power…
Murray
May 25, 2004 at 10:47 pm
6Sort of reminds me of the sixties where the police didn’t need to knock, could bust down your door and tear your walls apart looking for drugs. If your neighbor got sick of listening to your cello playing he could put a stop to it with one simple call to the local authorities. “That’s right, loads of drugs, in the wall, and he keeps a special stash tucked up inside that cello, use an axe”. We have come a long ways, back then they didn’t apologize.
If the police are the ones terrorizing you, who do you turn to?
Chris
May 26, 2004 at 12:22 am
7The voting booth, I hope!
Jerry
May 26, 2004 at 3:11 am
8Adam, I’ve been enjoying your work for a while now, but this is the best so far. What a weird sensation: tears of laughter and chills from “the winds that..blow”
“More: And go he should, if he were the devil himself, until he broke the law.
“George: So now you’d give the devil benefit of law!
“More: Yes. What would you do? Cut a great road through the law to get to the devil?
“George: Yes! I’d cut down every law in the United States to do that.
“More: Oh? And when the last law was down and the devil turned round on you - where would you hide, George, the laws all being flat? This country is planted thick with laws, from coast to coast, man’s laws, not God’s, and if you cut them down - and you’re just the man to do it - do you really think you could stand upright in the winds that would blow then? Yes, I’d give the devil benefit of law - for my own safety’s sake.”
From “A President of Little Reason”
Jerry
May 26, 2004 at 3:16 am
9BTW, Happy First Birthday to the Homeland Security Act!
Jerry
May 26, 2004 at 3:20 am
10Oops: Happy SECOND Birthday to the Homeland Security Act. They grow up so fast! It seems like just yesterday we had most of our rights…
marc
May 26, 2004 at 4:46 am
11Murray mentioned that it reminded him of the sixties.To me it reminds me of 1970 in quebec and trudeau had inacted the Martial Law.It was not a pretty site,thousands rounded up and imprisoned without due cause, I hope your Patriot Act never goes that far.
Rob
May 26, 2004 at 12:55 pm
12I live a few miles from Brandon Mayfield. My wife has visited the mosque he belongs to. The local media has been following the story pretty closely. He’s hopping mad and he has every right to be.
One interesting note: the written statement released by the FBI said “…the FBI apologizes to Mr. Mayfield…” but the spoken statement given by the FBI agent in charge said “…the FBI regrets …” instead. The agent couldn’t bring himself to say the “A” word. Just another illustration of the power of words.
Speaking of which, here’s a suggestion for folks on our side of the culture war - when referring to the legislation that allowed the FBI to burglarize Mayfield’s home, always call it “the so-called Patriot Act”. Always. Don’t let them get away with stealing the word “patriot”. I’m a patriot, and I’m doing my patriotic duty by opposing the so-called Patriot Act and the people who created it.
Kerry
May 26, 2004 at 1:52 pm
13>>I’m now afraid to drink margaritas or dance Salsa — in either order.
Sara J
May 26, 2004 at 5:55 pm
14In the Seattle Weekly last week, a story about what happens when a citizen is assaulted by a cop:
http://tinyurl.com/2693v
If that citizen happens to be a popular talk radio host, he has a chance. Otherwise, look out!
Jerry
May 26, 2004 at 5:55 pm
15OK, forget the Patriot Act Anniversary…I was off by five months. Don’t ask, I just got the wrong date, OK?
But I WOULD like to rename it the “Brandon Mayfield Act” to remind everyone what it is really all about!
Sara J
May 26, 2004 at 5:57 pm
16Here’s an excerpt from that article:
“I told 911 I was assaulted by a police officer and asked for immediate assistance. The person on the phone said, ‘This is an internal matter, so let me give you a phone number.’ I said, ‘I don’t know if I have time to take a phone number. I’ve been assaulted and I don’t know if he will continue; the officer is still here, in front of me.’ But still this guy on the phone is very disinterested. ‘Call internal affairs. Here’s their number.’ When I called that number, the person answering said I needed to call 911. I said, ‘I just can’t believe this—this is circular. I started by calling 911. I’m in fear for my safety right now.
“They gave me another number to call—meanwhile this cop is looking at me like he wants to kick my ass. His buddy came over and said, ‘What’s the problem?’ I explained, and the officer smiled at the other cop, and the one who assaulted me said, ‘If you make any more phone calls, we can make this very difficult for you. I mean, very difficult.’
Jerry
May 26, 2004 at 6:04 pm
17Sara J- anyone reading the excerpt ought to read the article. Appparently he started out asking, basically, what the cop wanted him to do, explained why he asked, and the cop just went “High School Vice-Principal” on him
Sara J
May 26, 2004 at 6:16 pm
18what I thought was most interesting about the Weekly story is that Dick’s, the place where this happened, is a very popular hangout on a very busy street. (For context, it was memorialized in Sir Mix-a-Lot’s “Posse on Broadway”.) It is clear from the story that many people were in line at the burger window at the time of the incident.
So, these cops felt free to threaten anyone with impunity, even in front of at least a dozen witnesses. You gotta wonder what they would do if nobody else was around.
Okay, this is off topic because it’s just local beat cops and not the FBI, but it’s the culture that counts. Welcome to the war against totalitarian authority! The sad part is, it’s nothing new. I feel like Sisyphus.
region free dvd player
January 27, 2006 at 5:08 am
19Ping