From CNN - “Bush Pokes Fun at Himself at Dinner”

Bush put on a slide show, calling it the “White House Election-Year Album” at the Radio and Television Correspondents’ Association 60th annual dinner, showing himself and his staff in some decidedly unflattering poses.

There was Bush looking under furniture in a fruitless, frustrating search. “Those weapons of mass destruction have got to be somewhere,” he said.

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Campaigning in Florida, April 12, 2004:
“All through the spring of 2001, Dick Clarke was asking to see me about something urgent. I said, ‘Call me old-fashioned, but I only want to see Dick Clarke on New Years Eve!’ Thank you! So when he came to see me on September 12th, I remember saying, ‘Whoa, Dick! Didn’t you used to just drop a ball?!’ Get it? Drop a ball…”

To the troops, Iraq, May 4, 2004:
“Maybe you guys misheard me: I said they had ‘weapons of ass destruction.’ And it’s your ass! Hahaha! Thank you…”

To Future Farmers of America, May 25, 2004
Some people are saying, ‘When Clinton Lied, Nobody Died.’ That’s pretty clever. But I say, ‘When Bush Feigned, No Dresses Got Stained!’ Whoa! Folks!”

To the Young President’s Association, June 17, 2004
“So I heard today that more people than ever are living below the poverty line. Well, I have some advice for those folks: Move north! Thank you, you’re very kind…”

To an Illinois Rotary Club meeting, July 4, 2004:
“…so I said to the war widow, ‘What casket? I thought YOU had it!’ No, seriously, you know I made that up - I don’t go to soldiers’ funerals. Those people are touch-y, lemme tellya. They’re like a Frenchman’s pantry - no cash and plenty of whine. Thank you! Drive safe, and remember to tip your waitress…”