It’s been too long since I’ve posted one of those collections of Informative and Humorous Nuggets of Content. Today, I’ll rectify that. It’s been a busy week, both here at FA and in the rest of the world, and there’s no way that I can possibly offend everyone with a single, high-concept post. Sound bites are an infinitely more efficient means of getting yourself heard, quoted, and misunderstood.
On the Fire Down Below
Directly beneath this post, you’ll notice that my jab at our President’s attempt to link oil executives with our Real American Heroes has generated an 80+ Commentapalooza. Some of it is great stuff, illustrating why the Comments are my favorite part of running this site. My only request is that y’all continue to try to keep things civil. After all, there’s a place you can go to type you opinions in capital letters while vociferously insulting the intelligence, lifestyle, and sexual proclivities of any who dare oppose you. It’s called “the rest of the internet.”
On Howard Dean
People have been pointing out that I haven’t been saying all that much about Howard Dean around here. That’ll change. Mostly, I’ve just been enjoying the spectacle of opponents and lazy pundits trying to pin a conventional label on him that’ll stick. For the record, based on what I’ve been reading, he’s definitely too liberal to win the general election. Or else he’s too conservative to win the general election. One or the other. Definitely.
I do have some advice for Dean supporters, however. When skeptics offer specific criticisms, don’t bother trying to deny ‘em. People have been saying Dean’s overly angry, he’s just a trend, he’s short, he’s too easily photographed making goofy faces while speaking. To these you should reply, “That’s ‘President Short Angry Trendy Goofy-Face’ to you, bucko!”
On the Issues
There are a lot of new visitors this week, so let me clarify where I stand on something:
If I had a son named Joey (I don’t), and he was being bullied in his fourth grade class (he isn’t - Joey doesn’t exist) and he wanted to put an end to it and stand up to said bully, he’d have my blessing. I’d just say, “Go ahead, Joey - you know I trust you. You go ahead and show ‘em that Joey Felber is nobody’s punching bag!”
Suppose, however, I received the following call from Joey’s teacher, Mrs. Carlyle, the very next afternoon. Suppose the hypothetical Mrs. Carlyle had this to say: “Hello, Mr. Felber.”
“Hello, imaginary but well-liked instructor of my hypothetical son. What can I do for you?”
“Well, it’s Joey. He, um, struck back at the child who’d been bullying him today, and it’s a bit of a pickle.”
“How so? It’s about time my little Joey stood up for himself!”
“Well, he lobbed a hand grenade into the bully’s lunch box, killing the bully and wounding 9 other nearby students.”
“Oh.”
I’d hang up, then, pour myself a drink, and wonder whether I was now indirectly responsible for another Columbine. I’d certainly rue the day that I trusted Joey to retaliate in a responsible, measured fashion. How could I have foreseen that he’d do something so damned stupid? Sure, he always had a temper, but… Anyway, am I sure Joey’s really my son at all? What about that weekend my wife spent in Minneapolis? She seemed awfully odd when she came home, and 8-12 months later, there was Joey. Maybe I should order some DNA tests…
Okay, those last few ruminations don’t do me a lot of credit, I admit it. Please understand that by that point I would’ve had a couple of large, imaginary bourbons in my system. But you have to admit that until then, my responses were pretty sensible vis-a-vis my nonexistent psychotic son and how I advised him to act. Maybe I should’ve foreseen that the li’l fictitious rugrat was going to go berserk, but hell - I didn’t. After all, he WAS in the right. I figured he’d go to his teachers, or band together with some similarly oppressed school chums and enact some amusing and colorful revenge scenario worthy of a Disney film, probably involving a large but hitherto ignored vat of custard. After all, Joey’d never blown up a classmate before…
That, my friends, old and new, is how I feel about the Iraq War. And that is why I don’t fault John Kerry, John McCain, or anyone else in the US Congress for voting to authorize the use of force. [Nor do I fault the military, for bravely and competently carrying out their orders.]
It’s President Joey’s fault.
Fanny Roborat
42 comments
Dee
December 13, 2003 at 4:04 pm
1All along you’ve been saying what I’ve been thinking about Iraq - Saddam was evil and he needed to be dealt with. But we sure managed to do it in the worst possible way, from alienating our friends to poor military planning to selling our souls to Halliburton et al. The problem starts at the top, with the “You’re either with us or against us” policy. Fighting terrorism is a complex problem that requires a thoughful and forceful response. Too bad we only got it half right.
AND, Adam, I believe you can look forward to some kosher coal in your stocking this year. No Santa, indeed!!!!
Benedict
December 13, 2003 at 5:29 pm
2I would like to see more vats of custard in the Public School system AND the DoD.
Anonymous
December 13, 2003 at 6:04 pm
3mmmmmmm, CUSTARD
Bob
December 13, 2003 at 7:16 pm
4I’m sick and tired of all the whining from the Let’s Blame Joey Felber First crowd. And that Mrs. Carlyle must really hate primary education.
Brad Johnson
December 13, 2003 at 7:16 pm
5An entertaining analogy, but it should have included: “Then again, Joey’s best friend, Robert (who does not exist–I mean, I’m not saying Joey has imaginary friends; well, let’s just say Joey and Robert have equivalent existence metrics) did show me his plans a few weeks beforehand which outlined having Joey lob a grenade into the bully’s lunch box so that Robert could step in and run the lunch-money racket at the school.”
Kerry, McCain, etc. were trusting Bush to be responsible, when the people in charge of Bush’s foreign policy have been planning and advocating invading Iraq for years.
And that is why they should have been less gullible.
Jacob
December 13, 2003 at 7:22 pm
6Adam,
Was this weeks WWDTM taping pre- or post-Commentapalooza? Just curious…
John Isbell
December 13, 2003 at 8:58 pm
7FUN POST. OH WAIT…
Joshua Scholar
December 13, 2003 at 10:59 pm
8There’s nothing that makes Adam Felber so depressed that he needs to crawl into an imaginary bottle like … like the end of an oppressive fascist regime.
Then there’s the “we did it wrong” canard:
- Our few “allies” who were against us would NEVER have allowed Iraq to be liberated.
- As for the horrible violence you pretend to deplore - it was less violence than any invasion in history, and less violence than Saddam perpetrated on his people and neighbors on an ongoing basis - as no doubt his psychotic sons would have continued for the next 50 years.
So you’re basically crying over the fact that we saved lives and brought freedom the least violent way possible.
Of course this also brought an end to the embargo and so people have a chance to live prosperous lives too for the first time.
I don’t know what weird values make you hallucinate that doing the best mitzvah possible (a mitzvah is a good deed) is a horrible crime… I guess your values don’t allow you to take reality into account.
This brings up my argument about whether you’re funny. I guess partisan satire has to have a good cause behind it. No one would remember an imaginary Mark Twain who wrote Huck Fin as a satire in favor of slavery.
Or just maybe they would, Mark Twain was a much less self righteous writer than you are despite the fact that he (the real Mark Twain) wrote satire supporting infinitely more righteous causes.
Remember Chrissie Hyde talking about how she supports the Taliban killing apostates and the like? And all the while she’s writing songs about having sex with anonymous strangers while her favorite Taliban are executing women for minor sins like having their hair styled. Your opinions are as disconnected from reality as Chrissie Hyde’s. Satire in the service of ignorance is hard to take. Actually understanding things hasn’t destroyed Dennis Miller’s career, you know.
Katie
December 13, 2003 at 11:33 pm
9HEY!!!
How dare you imply that Minneapolis is a place of wild promicuity and indeterminate procreating!! As a card carrying Minnesotan, I resent that implication! How DARE you!
Katie, in Minnesota
Katie
December 13, 2003 at 11:34 pm
10oh, and by the way…. if you could just email me exactly where your wife was staying while in Minneapolis, I could go and check it out. For the good of all minnesotans of course.
Jack
December 13, 2003 at 11:36 pm
11Joshua,
Do you think you’re convincing anyone here of anything? It’s a satire website. Calling Adam the devil isn’t winning you any friends here.
Anyway, nice allegory, Adam. I still don’t think they should have supported the war in the first place, but at least you’ve given us a peek at their possible mindset when they did.
Jack
December 13, 2003 at 11:38 pm
12please please, remember to close your italics tags! let’s see…
Katie
December 13, 2003 at 11:39 pm
13But I did close the italics tag!!!!
Honest!!
katie
December 13, 2003 at 11:40 pm
14oops. inverted the ‘i’ and the ‘/’.
sorry.
I’ll go sit in the corner now.
Hunter
December 14, 2003 at 12:01 am
15For pete’s sake, writing a comment on a *humor* blog bitching about the political slant. Sorry, Adam, I have to do this…
“This brings up my argument about whether you’re funny.”
We have to decide what’s funny? And according to you? You’re the God of what’s funny? That sounds pretty sweet, here I’ve been going along in my life deciding for myself what’s funny (”MST3K”: funny) and not (”Friends”: not funny). And rarely, if ever, have I gone into a multi-day snit because, for example, Marmaduke was granted space in my local paper, or because conservative political cartoonist Michael CantDrawForCrap drew a picture contrary to my views. Here I’ve been just “getting over it”, when what I should really do is appoint myself King of What’s Funny, and solve the problem once and for all. See you in Hell, goddamn 20-year-old Peanuts reruns!
“As for the horrible violence you pretend to deplore…”
Not funny according to you is equivalent to being a sociopath? Got it. The rest of those sentences I won’t touch.
“No one would remember an imaginary Mark Twain who wrote Huck Fin as a satire in favor of slavery.”
Actually, The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn has been repeatedly banned from schools over the years. Indeed, some people have — unbelievably — railed against it for promoting the Southern mythos of kind-and-gentle slavery. Of course, it’s not pro-slavery. The people who think it is pro-slavery are simply deeply stupid. They aren’t getting the point. That doesn’t make Mark Twain less funny. It just makes them too dimwitted to get the intended message.
“Or just maybe they would, Mark Twain was a much less self righteous writer than you are despite the fact that he (the real Mark Twain) wrote satire supporting infinitely more righteous causes. ”
Actually, Mark Twain was a self-admitted ass, misanthrope, and curmudgeon, three traits I greatly admire. His satire was frequently politically motivated, and often mean spirited. Not all of his compatriots — especially the politicians he lampooned — agreed with his often-biting views. I will admit, Adam Felber has never taken on a cause nearly as “righteous” as the plight of the incredible jumping frogs, but perhaps so soon after appointing the Judge of What’s Funny, we should be wary of piling on the title of Judge of What Is Sufficiently Righteous.
And now I’m ticked off, because I come to this site to write attempted-funny posts, and this is too serious. So pretend I threw in a joke about farting hamsters in here somewhere.
“Remember Chrissie Hyde talking about how she supports the Taliban killing apostates and the like?”
Dude, get over yourself. We’ve managed to go from “I don’t think it’s funny” to “secret-violence-lover” to “Taliban supporter.” Get a grip, OK? We get it. You’re conservative. You don’t like liberal humor. OK. You have, in the last few days, suddenly discovered that there is humor in the world that you don’t like, and humor you do like that other people don’t. You have discovered that “satire” inherently has to satirize something, thus making it by definition “partisan”, and all of this is eating you up inside. Understood. Chill!
What, exactly, do you want here? Adam to close his site down? Adam to approve his humor through you? The banning of Doonsbury from the funny pages? What is the *point* of bitching about Adam’s sense of humor, in Adam’s forum, exactly?
Look, to newcomers, let me say: Adam’s humor is generally oriented towards left-of-center. (As is most humor, with the possible exception of that “You know yer a redneck when…” guy.) If you don’t like it, don’t read it. You’ll live longer, and it will, I dunno, probably make your penis bigger or something.
historyenne
December 14, 2003 at 12:12 am
16Joshua Scholar, if Adam’s writing bothers you so much, why do you read it? Reading comedy that you don’t find amusing must be like beating yourself on the head with a brick: painful, pointless, and easily brought to an end. Surely there must be other blogs elsewhere that are more to your taste??
Stradiotto
December 14, 2003 at 12:43 am
17People, people! You’re doing Joshua Scholar a terrible injustice by taking him seriously. He’s satirizing the rantings of extreme Bush apologists.
He’s just not very good at it. What he needs is a course of study geared towards those “special needs” people one finds on the internet.
Fortunately, a valuable resource is now available.
I’m afraid Mr Scholar will have to hunt down his own tutorials. There are plenty of sites that serve as models. I never link to them. That would be enabling - always bad. You’ll not get that soft bigotry of low expectations from me! No sir.
Thad
December 14, 2003 at 2:59 am
18Actually, Adam, it’s a little more like this:
Back in the first grade, there was this little snit of a bully (let’s call him “Ira”) who was a real problem. He had started beating on this other kid, uh, “Kuwai,” who was one of the only kids on the playground smaller than Ira. It was really getting out of hand. So Joey Felber and like, twelve of his buddies — all way bigger and badder and more popular than Ira — intervened to deliver a richly-deserved ass-whupping. After that, Ira pretty much left Kuwai alone.
But Ira’d been holding a grudge all through the second grade, and had at various times talked a whole bunch of trash about how he was gonna get Joey Felber but good one of these days, just you wait. But Joey and all the other kids were always keeping a close eye on him. They all knew Ira might talk big, but so long as they were still watching everyone figured he’d never have the guts to actually pull anything.
Then, one day near the end of the second grade, something unexpected happened. Joey got suckered by a nasty kid no one had ever paid much attention to before, a vicious piece of work named, uh, Sammy O. Sammy O. went and kicked Joey in the balls and then cut and run. Everyone felt really bad for Joey, getting hit like that, and they spent the whole summer looking for Sammy O., but he was just nowhere to be found.
So at the end of summer and the beginning of third grade, Joey’s tired of hunting for Sammy O. He really really wants to kick the snot out of someone, but despite everyone’s best efforts it doesn’t look like Sammy O. is going to turn up anytime soon. So he gets this idea:
“I think Ira and Sammy O. are in cahoots!” he says. Everyone else is like, “Dude, what makes you say that, those guys hated each other.” But Joey insists that after all this time, they’ve got to move on Ira or he’s going to go back to his bullying ways. Again, everyone else is like, “Joey, are you sure? I mean, we’ve been coming down on him pretty hard ever since the whole thing with Kuwai, and I don’t think he’s about to step out of line again. He knows you’re still sore at him and he’ll get smacked if he does.” And Joey says, “C’mon guys, I heard that a few days ago Ira tried to buy a gun from, uh, Nigel!” And again, everyone else said, “Boy, that would sure be bad if Ira got a gun, but seriously, dude, where are you getting this stuff? There’s no way Ira would haven been able to get a gun from Nigel. But just to be sure, let’s frisk the little bugger every day when he comes to school.”
So the kids start frisking Ira every day. Ira sorta half-heartedly goes along with it, because he sure doesn’t want Joey and the others to kick the snot out of him again. It’s not like he’s being exactly cooperative — in fact he’s kind of squirmy and all — but what with the daily frisking, it also doesn’t look like Ira is in any position to pull any dumb shit. It’s a stalemate, but everyone seems basically happy to wait it out, confident that if Ira really is planning something bad, they’ll all be well-positioned to help Joey kick his sorry ass well into next Tuesday.
Except Joey starts getting impatient, and more than a little obviously unhinged. “Dammit, I want to kick Ira’s ass now! C’mon you losers, you better help me kick his ass right now or you’ll all be sorry!” And everyone else is like, “Joey, listen, we agreed to kick Ira’s ass just as soon as he does anything bad, but he hasn’t done anything bad yet.” And Joey says, “That Ira’s a bad sumbitch, don’t you remember? We gotta take him down!” And they’re like, “Sure, Joey, we all agree he’s a bad sumbitch, but the situation’s under control, okay?” And finally Joey just blows up, tells all his friends, “Fuck all y’all, what did you ever do for me, huh?” and storms off.
And then the next day, Joey walks into class and lobs a hand grenade into Ira’s lunch box, killing him and nine other students.
Mean Tim
December 14, 2003 at 4:21 am
19Really think yall should be doing this in the forum much easier to troll ya know…Ruh roh!
Anonymous
December 14, 2003 at 4:23 am
20What can I say I can’t be that mean…
But I’m leaving the bold tag on… ok I’m not
Anonymous
December 14, 2003 at 4:24 am
21‘
ok this tag thing is harder than I thought… no more messing with what I don’t understand…
Hunter
December 14, 2003 at 1:01 pm
22Testing comment fixing…
Hunter
December 14, 2003 at 1:01 pm
23testing more comments
Hunter
December 14, 2003 at 1:03 pm
24one more time
(testing)
Hunter
December 14, 2003 at 1:04 pm
25(testing)
Hunter
December 14, 2003 at 1:08 pm
26Oh, thank God. OK, the deal with comments is this… if you don’t close your bold, or italics, or whatever, the next posts can’t close it for you, because each post is in it’s own <div> tags. To fix it, you have to close the <div> tag too, to “break out” into rawness.
So instead of fixing an italic, say, by:
</i>
you have to fix it by saying:
</div></i>
That seems to work.
Hunter
December 14, 2003 at 1:21 pm
27(So please, please use the preview button to check that your tags are closed, if you want to use italics or other emotofonts. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of View Source.)
Ok, back to the topic.
Thad, that’s twisted. And damn accurate. I love it.
To add, though, Joey was being egged on by his “supposed” good friends, Dick, Wolfie, Dick, and Donald, who just wanted to see a good schoolyard fight. It may be that Joey was a perfectly fine kid — a little dim, perhaps, but a nice, quiet boy that kept to himself — until he fell in with the wrong crowd. Personally, I blame the parents.
Three cheers for the troops that apparently have captured Saddam. Hey Joey — give those boys their own (Texas) oil wells, will ya? Fake turkey ain’t gonna cut it this time.
Murray
December 14, 2003 at 1:28 pm
28I don’t listen to Rush, I don’t listen to Liddy, North, O Reilly, or any other right wing loony. Why? Why should I? I would only be doing the one thing they want. Listening. What it dose for them is increase listener ship and pay. They don’t care if I agree or fume. A friend of mine listens in order to contact their sponsors and tell them that not only will he boycott their products because of their support for these pieces of trash but he will see to it that his friends do also, (as if we need bail bondsmen, Prozac, Viagra, etc.).
So, I for one, will no longer respond to those with overwhelming mouth to brain ratios, (at least for today). Besides Joshua has already tried to make me cry in the previous comment column and for the most part it didn’t work. What more can he do?
(Besides, it would be exhausting to also counter all of the new nonsense that was countered so well by Hunter)
Tess
You know that this is the second time that we have been attacked together in a comment. Also if you recall your Sept 30 comment on how if Bush got reelected you wanted to move to Australia,
to which I responded that it sounded like a good idea, -send a photo. This is getting weird.
Technical question
What am I missing? How come everyone else gets to use italics, bold, etc.? My comment generator has no such options. Is it because I’m using Internet Explorer? Or am I just missing something obvious?
Murray
December 14, 2003 at 1:41 pm
29OK, I was composing my comment while Hunter was explaining how things work. It looks suspiciously like hypertext to me. It’s already a near miracle that someone my age is able to use a computer and the internet, let alone be fluent in hypertext, and if any of you whippersnappers don’t like it, I’ll crack you one with my slide rule.
julia
December 14, 2003 at 1:54 pm
30You’d think that our current flock of conservatives would be more closely in touch with the concept of the “subjective”
t.a.
December 14, 2003 at 5:01 pm
31“less violent than any other invasion in history” — are you kidding me? what about the nazis taking poland? that was done pretty easily. then there was reagan taking grenada; granted, a few cuban porta-potties had to be terminated but still, not too bad, in the violence dept.
i must have missed something along the way, where thousands of dead civilian no longer count as violent deaths. perhaps because our hearts were so pure, the fact that we obliterated thousands of iraqis with our bombs and other weapons is irrelevant and, in fact, was an act of peace and charity.
seems i could apply this philosophy to my personal life. i hope the local police and courts buy my argument and don’t actually prosecute me for murder.
tim
December 14, 2003 at 7:03 pm
32I’m just posting because this comments box looked lonely compared to the last one.
And Adam, thanks for completely ruining Christmas for me on WWDTM yesterday. You really are a sick fuck.
*sniff*
katie
December 14, 2003 at 11:56 pm
33Gee, thanks Adam.
I’ll never be able to sing that carol again.
Must admit though it had me ROFLMAO!
tess
December 15, 2003 at 1:15 am
34the first thing i heard this morning was my bro waking me up to tell me “they caught saddam.” the first thing that popped out of my mouth was, “oh shit, that means another 4 years of bush.” he paused and said, “you just have to put a damper on things, don’t you?”
Murray:
i’ll send photos of me running over wallabies and kangaroos, not to mention measuring the tide around the sydney opera house as soon as i can move. ;D
Joshua Scholar
December 15, 2003 at 6:38 am
35tess: Well I for one am REALLY pissed off that the Democrats started politicizing Iraq and the war on terror and taking the wrong side. Liberman and Hillary are taking the right side but Hillary isn’t running and Liberman is dead in the water.
Dean and the rest deserve the failure that’s coming to them but the American people deserve to get a real choice in the election and we won’t get one.
We either have to vote for Bush or for some frivolous idiot who we can’t trust to protect us or do the right things in the Middle East.
And I am so sick of being called a right winger. As if you have to be an idiotic pacifist or a bloody Quaker in order to be a leftist. Nor should it be a requirement to be a blind partisan reactionary sheep who rejects policies based on who came up with them rather than based on their effects…
janna
December 15, 2003 at 8:50 am
36stepping into the fray…
Joshua Scholar: First, don’t start with the bull that it was only the Democrats politicizing the war in Iraq. It simply isn’t true. They have taken part, but they are NOT alone.
I resent the fact that because I have held serious questions and reservations about the administration’s actions, that has been immediately labelled a political knee-jerk reaction. Those reservations still exist, buddy, even with the great results (in terms of finding Saddam) yesterday. evil man, but still just an old, dirty man in a hole.
The idea that there is one “right side” and anyone who doesn’t agree completely is on the “wrong side” is just immature — and that’s something everyone should remember.
If you’re sick of being labelled a right winger (stop acting like one and) stop labelling others.
Re: the next election. National security and foreign affairs are not the only issues on the table. Anyone who is willing to risk… let alone support… continuing down the disastrous road W&Co. have dragged us merely because they disagree with a candidate’s position on this one issue… well, I won’t use the word reactionary (just did), or knee-jerk (oops, did it again) but… i don’t know. I’ve never been to Australia, but they sure do have purdy accents and interesting flora and fauna…
And besides, the only “frivolous idiot” i’ve see running for President this time around is the one who already holds that title.
Adam: you always earn at least an appreciative chuckle from this camp, and this time is no exception. I loved the “Profiles in Courage” post. And, hey, if you’re not pissing off someone. what’s the point?
Chicory
December 15, 2003 at 9:43 am
37Tess- you and I had the same thoughts upon hearing about Saddam. My third one was, “When are they gonna get Bin Ladin?” Now there is a bad mother.
Perhaps the problem here is that the dissenters are actually Puritans- you know, those folks who fear that someone somewhere is having a good time?
MrClark
December 15, 2003 at 12:45 pm
38Don’t you worry, tess. Capturing Sadaam will do exactly as much for W’s re-election campaign as capturing Noriega did for his dad’s.
Ras_Nesta
December 15, 2003 at 1:35 pm
39Josh ‘Scholar’: “…understanding things hasn’t destroyed Dennis Miller’s career, you know.”
I guess the best irony is unintentional. Dennis “Definition of a Boomer Sellout” Miller traded a hipster doofus audience for the the propadanda-loving dim mouth-breathers watching Faux News. I hope he chokes on his “Miller Class tax cut” (The exact moment I never listened to anything that turd-with-legs had to say ever again).
Joshua Scholar
December 15, 2003 at 2:25 pm
40I don’t have cable do I didn’t know Miller got another show. Good luck to him.
You know the definition of “Sellout” is “someone who’s more successful than I’ll ever be especially considering the obvious fact that I have a pissy attitude toward success.”
Ras_Nesta
December 15, 2003 at 4:33 pm
41No Josh, a “sellout” is someone who seemingly turns their back on their principles the minute they make enough money to do so.
I was a fan back when Dennis Miller’s schtick was ruthlessly skewering the powers-that-be. Suddenly, he started making tall Monday Night Football dollars, and then all he could talk about on his HBO show week after week was how unfair it was that his poor, unfortunate multi-millionaire ass had to pay taxes. I switched him off, he lost the MNF gig, his HBO show got pulled.
Then 9/11 happened and Miller couldn’t get his tongue down the back of Bush’s suddenly-popular trousers fast enough. As Miller stated at a $2,000/plate Bush fundraising luncheon in Burlingame, CA earlier this year, “[Miller’s become] a Rat Pack of one for the president in Hollywood.” I must have heard him make the cruel “make Iraq/Afghanistan/AnywhereThere’sPoorBrownPeople look like Superman’s Crystal Palace” ‘joke’ about a hundred times.
Once Dennis Miller made jokes at the expense of the rich and powerful. Now that he’s rich and powerful, he jokes about indiscriminately vaporizing millions of people.
(Although Adam asked on the main page that we keep things from getting personal, I have to comment on your ultra-asshole “I [me] have a pissy attitude towards sucess” strawman. I’m getting laid off from my very good-paying job in a few days you fucking prat, and if you said that to me in person with my current mood, I would feed you your teeth. I don’t have a problem with success, I have a problem with multi-multi-millionaires who wrap themselves in the flag, yet whine and bitch endlessly about paying taxes to support the country.)
tess
December 15, 2003 at 6:12 pm
42Joshua Scholar:
so we’re safer knowing that a despot who apparently had no nuclear weapons capability, no bio-warfare agents, no chemical agents is now in custody? oh boy, that makes me feel a whole lot better! you know, if he were such a big threat and had huge stockpiles of weapons, you’d think we’d find at least some of them by now.
as for “frivolous idiots” i think giving no-bid contracts to companies like halliburton, pissing off historical alliances, obscene deficit spending, and tax cuts for the rich count as both “frivolity” and “idiocy.” if you claim to at least be centrist, then can you honestly say that you’re for ANY of these things?