Some of you have asked why I’ve spent so little time commenting on the approaching California recall election. It’s heating up, you say, and the people of California are awaiting the firm, guiding hand of Fanatical Apathy to tell them what to think, how to vote, and where to hide afterwards.

Honestly, I find the whole thing incredibly sad. Where the news media finds their first easy laughs since Uday and Qusay met their hi-larious slapstick end, I see only tragedy. A disused trapdoor was found and opened at the bottom of the old-fashioned pyjamas of California politics. So it should surprise no one what’s going to come out of it.

California has what some would call a “strong” governorship, full of powers, obligations, and responsibilities. It’s not a glorified figurehead position with little power and generous vacation time that can be easily and painlessly fobbed off on any boob that stumbles down the pike with his pants around his ankles and a fistful of dollars. Like, say, Texas.

And California needs leadership now, and needs it badly. They feel betrayed by leaders who promise one thing and do another. No more broken pledges or misleading assessments - they needs a governor who’s going to stand up and say something like, “Now, we face a severe budget shortfall. Its sheer magnitude boggles the mind and threatens the unprecedented progress we’ve made together. This is a national crisis, afflicting nearly every state in America. We didn’t seek it, but we do not shirk from it. We didn’t produce it, but we will prevail against it… In the meantime, we must tighten our belts without hardening our hearts. And, to the extent possible, protect our progress in public education, public safety and children’s health insurance. Now is not the time for pomp and circumstance, but for hard work, hard truth and hard choices.”

Okay, that was from Gray Davis’ inaugural address back in January. But you see my point - out with the bastards, it’s time to get someone who says things like that into the statehouse.

It’s tempting to blame the people of California for this one, but that’s only because it’s their fault. They’ve accepted more bad propositions than a drunk debutante with low self-esteem, including Proposition 37 (”Why Not Cut Property, Income, and Sales Taxes, Just ‘Cuz?”), Proposition 183 (”The Comprehensive Land Grant For Anyone Who Asks Act”), and Proposition 42 (The “Let’s Buy Everyone a Latte and Ask the Money Fairy to Pay For It” Amendment). In retrospect, I’m sure a lot of Californians wish they hadn’t voted for some of those. Though I’d bet that this won’t stop ‘em from trying to fix the fiscal crisis with yet another ill-conceived ballot item (like Proposition 25 - The “Let’s Tap Nevada on the Shoulder, Point Towards Colorado, and Then Take Their Wallets While They’re Looking the Other Way” Initiative). What needs fixing is the Californian tendency to govern by committee, where that committee is defined as “all voters.”

So what’s my advice for my California readers? Vote against the recall. Not because Davis is a good Governor. Just look at it as your chance to help your state back away from its extracurricular voting habit, one day at a time.