[*RING* *RING* … *RING* *RING*]

BLAIR: mmmf… ehm… hello?

BUSH: Tonenstein! Bushy. Just got the message that you called.

BLAIR: Hmmm.. wha? George, it’s three in the morning here.

BUSH: Huh. Weird. It’s not nearly that late out here. You guys in the middle of August?

BLAIR: Yes. It’s August everywhere, George.

BUSH: See? We’re not so different.

BLAIR: [unintelligible]

BUSH: So, Tone - what’d you want?

BLAIR: Well, it’s the whole “dodgy dossier” thing. I’m really in a bit of a spot here, George, and it’s getting worse. “Lack of an imminent threat,” is what they’re saying, and I could use a bit of help. Things have actually gotten quite bad over here.

BUSH: Hmm. That’s a real cannon-drum, there, Tone-Loc. Had some of that myself last month…

BLAIR: “Cannon-drum?”

BUSH: - but it went away. Gone, goodbye. Free n’ easy. Cleared right up like a summer rash.

BLAIR: Well, it hasn’t cleared up around here, George. I’m having a devil of a time…

[Laughter]

BLAIR: George?

BUSH: Heh. I was just thinkin’… Now when somebody asks, “Where’s the outrage?” I can just point ‘em your way. Heh heh heh!

BLAIR: That’s very amusing.

BUSH: Ha ha! “Where’s the outrage?” “Well, it’s right over there in Englewood!”

BLAIR: -England -

BUSH: Heh! “Yup. That’s where it is!”

BLAIR: - Okay, now-

BUSH: Ha! Good one there, Blair-bear.

BLAIR: Yes. So, what do you say we send some more of your intelligence on weapons of mass destruction and terrorist ties this way in order to shore up your old friend “Blair-bear’s” argument? What do you say to that, George?

BUSH: Oooh. Um. Sorry, Tone. It’s classified.

BLAIR: The war’s over, George.

BUSH: Put on a flight suit when you’re sayin’ that! Ha! See, I got to put on a -

BLAIR: I know George. I saw. But I’d really appreciate a bit of a leg up here.

BUSH: Yeah. Okay. See, I don’t think I’m gonna do that.

BLAIR: But… you… I…

BUSH: See, Karl says you’re pretty much finished over there, Tone-man. Says you cooked the books.

BLAIR: But so did y-

BUSH: And so I gotta cut bait on ya. Sorry. We’re still pals, right?

BLAIR: I can’t believe I’m hearing this.

BUSH: Heh - when you Australian dudes say “can’t,” ya know what it sound like?

BLAIR: Yes, I know. But really, George…

BUSH: Hey, it’s gonna be fine. We just can’t get together that much anymore. You’re kinda a liabilimus an’ all.

BLAIR: George, please…

BUSH: But hey, if you want someone to talk to, I’ve got this friend, been through the same thing. I could give you his number - you guys could play some golf. His name’s Ken Lay, a real good guy-

[*Click*]

BUSH: Hello? Tonimator? Hello? …. Huh.

[End Transcript]